morning coffee + dying blooms

{by mwashin}

as you may have noticed, at the start of every month i post about what’s been on my mind for the last four weeks. it’s a way to recapture, remember, and solidify what i did + loved + experienced during the previous month. september is a very special month, though, so to me it deserves something a little different. even though there are technically a couple weeks left summer, with the start of school + the change in weather, the start of september always feels like the start of fall, so i figured today was the perfect day to collect a string of moments from the summer season as a whole, moments that when i look back on 2010, i will think…

that was the SUMMER when…

* i wrote my best poetry

* i let my hair get ridiculously long, like small of my back long

* i started both a tumblr + and a twitter

* i put hanson’s shout it out on daily rotation

* i didn’t get to see jack or john in concert, which ended up being okay

*i found out i wasn’t as interested in psychology as i thought

* i had my heart broken by sergei gonchar

* i traveled nowhere, except a few day trips to pittsburgh

* i purged four trash bags worth of irrelevant things from my past

* i watched a ton of movies, some good but most bad (sigh)

* i made local natives // the tallest man on earth // balmorhea // mumford & sons // damien rice // sondre lerche the soundtrack of the season

* i organized my life around my mother’s oncology appointments

*  i re-watched veronica mars + sports night + 30 rock each all the way through

* i bought an embarrassing number of purses

* i ate clementines + crusty bread consistently

* i took a thousand photos of  morning coffee + dying blooms + the sky

* i read charles bukowski for the first time

* i was convinced the NHL regular season would never come

* i learned the importance of taking risks

* i fell in love with the wonder that is IKEA

* i welcomed two adorable vagabond cats into our family

* i marveled at the beauty of brandywine falls

* i heard hanson perform madeline + save me live for the first time ever

* i didn’t post for two full weeks, and came back a better blogger

* i said goodbye to billy guerin

* i took these forgotten photos…

when you look back on this summer, what will you remember?

xo Alison

twitter | tumblr

what you can get away with

it’s the beginning of august

and here’s what’s been on my mind

[photo credit]

{at the start of each month i stop & take a moment to recount & remember the last four weeks}

one // community. today i received loveliness in the mail from two giveaways i won recently, the first being a gorgeous print and the second a flying wish paper kit. after i opened them up and reveled in the general awesomeness of photography + imaginativeness, i realized the likelihood of me having these new things if i didn’t have my little space here would be very small. it brought on an “isn’t the internet grand” kind of moment, or more specifically an “isn’t the blogging world grand?”. and that’s because it is. i’ve been keeping an online diary for a couple of years now, but it’s never meant as much to me as it does today, right now, in this moment. over the past few months, i’ve developed such a wildly beautiful + interesting community of writers, photographers, design goddesses, and all around swell people, which has helped turn my blog into not only a chronicle of my shenanigans, pittburgh penguins lurve, creative musings, and random wish lists, but a place i use and go for comfort + friendship. if my mother being diagnosed with leukemia has taught me anything, it’s that you can’t have too many safety nets and i’m equally giddy + proud to call you, my readers, one of those nets.

two //autumn. its turning leaves. its thick quilts. its perennials + early evening light + venti lattes. its cardigans + relatively stress-free hockey matches. its smell. its thick, crunchy textures. its holidays. it’s everything. i’m so ready!

three // words if wisdom.

photo credits: one. two. three.

four //the next 12 months. i can honestly say for the first time in my life that i am not completely certain where i am going to be living and what i am going to be doing one year from now. i know where i want to be and what i want to be doing, but the road to get there is so complicated + exciting + scary that there’s really no certainty. which means the next 12 months have an undercurrent of fantastic trepidation to them. so needless to say, they have been on my mind.

five // this song.

six // taking risks. i am a creature of habit. i don’t like surprises and i always plan ahead. recently i’ve been trying to change things up. i came across the eleanor roosevelt quote “do one thing everyday that scares you” and i realized that there are times when i let the analytical, organized, sensible alison have too much control over my life + decisions. so far it’s been pretty liberating to step outside my own habits, put my own protective instincts aside, and do something everyday that scares me. thanks, eleanor. i needed that.

seven // these forgotten moments.

what have you been up to these last four weeks?

xo Alison

twitter | tumblr

heart + wit

it’s the beginning of july

and here’s what’s been on my mind

{source}

{at the start of each month i stop & take a moment to recount & remember the last four weeks}

:: hockey. i’m not a big fan of summer. there are things i love about it, like ice tea + clementines,  the morning light, the shins + nick drake, but overall it’s my least favorite time of year. it’s hot. it’s humid. it’s buggy. it makes me feel restless + lackadaisical. there’s no new TV, no cardigans, and above all…no hockey. in short, it sucks. and right now, with the gut wrenching loom of free agency, i’d give anything for a 7:30 start against buffalo tonight, a two minute post-practice interview with max talbot, even an injury report on a farm team defenseman would be totally welcomed by me right now. i swear, i’m a little off balanced without it. there’s, like, all this time in the evenings 3-4 times a week that i have no idea what to do with, hell even more when i factor in phoenix and tampa and chicago. i accidentally came across one of the center ice channels the other day, and i almost burst into tears at the sound of the theme song. that’s how much i miss it. and it’s only july. and we’re about to lose one of my favorite players of all time. and those damn hawks have our cup. okay, end of babble. let’s go pens.

:: gratitude. for my health. for my friends. for all of my incredibly supportive + kind + creative readers. for the amazing moop bag i won in julie’s giveaway. for finding the perfect shade of pink nail polish. for my brains + heart + wit. for DVR, seasonal beer, and IKEA. for aaron sorkin’s writing. for smartphones. for local nature + chamomile body wash + irish music. for food in the pantry. for classical music, daylilies, and for a million other little things.

:: inspiration.

photo credits: one. two. three.

:: cleaning. i’ve been doing a lot of it lately. i’m not uber fond of the word purging {it always makes me think of bulimic 13 year old girls } but it’s technically a more accurate word. i didn’t realize just how much a messy email inbox + tokens from my past randomly organized in the hall + computer space being taken up by unimportant photos left an impact on my wellbeing and mental state. but it did. it was a weight i didn’t know was on me, and now i feel lighter. i feel good. :)

:: these boys

:: my poetry. i’ve been writing poetry since the first grade, but i’ve never really considered myself a poet. i’m a writer. that’s what i am. i’m a poetry reader. but i’m a poet in the same way i’m a photographer: it’s something i love + do, but that i will never be or do at a professional level. lately i’ve been feeling differently though. my experience in the poetry course i took this summer was pretty exhilarating. the annotations, the advice, the vocabulary, the prompts. it was so inspiring, and brought really great things out of me. and people actually liked my poems. my published, PhD holding professor gushed. and it makes me want to take it more seriously, to be less afraid to ask for feedback, to not give up when it doesn’t come easily. which i think it pretty exciting. ❤

:: these forgotten moments.

what were your last four weeks like?

xo Alison

p.s. gonchar is now a senator. excuse me while i vomit.

to my clavicle

it’s the beginning of june and here’s what’s been on my mind

{source}

{at the start of each month i stop & take a moment to recount & remember the last four weeks}

:: hockey. i miss it. i miss my boys. i miss post-practice scrums + off day videos + locker room sound bites. i miss the excitement of a break away, the thrill of an OT goal. i miss singing along with the anthems. i miss keeping track of the conference scores +  refreshing my penguins app on the hour + figuring out which games we’re going to go to. i miss scheduling my life around games. i even miss the nhl center ice theme songs. i loath this time of year, with the stress + inevitable disappointment of free agency, and watching the SC final like a kid peaking through a window. and i have been watching the final {go me!} and rooting for the hawks {woooo 2-0!}…but it’s not the same. it’s not my boys. it’s not the long haul of the regular season. it’s not “sorry, i gotta go, the third period is starting.” or “i can’t, we have a game.” basically, i miss one of my biggest passions. is it october yet?

:: muffins.

:: john mayer. for the first time since 2003, JM will be performing a concert in town that i won’t be at. it makes me blue. i know i’ve seen him many, many times, and i know i just saw him in january from our best seats yet {2nd row center!}, but it still doesn’t change the sting of change. and here’s why i adore him ::

:: organization. over the last few weeks i’ve let myself become scattered + disorganized. my room is a mess. my closet is a disaster. my shoes are everywhere. even my writing desk is becoming cluttered. and it’s starting to weigh me down. i sort of feel like there’s a kite attached to my clavicle that continues to pull at me in annoyance every time i try to concentrate, reminding me that things are too. damn. messy. i need to fix that. i need to clear my mind + space + and get back to the real me.

:: films. i’m in a movie rut. over the last couple months i’ve watched a ton of movies, but besides the sublime up in the air and fantastic mr. fox {oooh, i’m sensing a theme}, they’ve mostly fallen flat. the brother’s bloom, away we go, 500 days of summer, flags of our fathers, the chumscrubber, bright star, persuasion, defiance, and most recently an education…all left me disappointed. each had moments i enjoyed, and some had parts that i loved. none of them blew me away, though, or touched me, moved me, made me want to watch them again the next day. any suggestions? i’m sick of being underwhelmed. ugh.

:: whales.

{click image for link}

:: waiting. for those keeping track, next month is my mother’s big oncology appointment when we decide if she’s going to begin chemotherapy treatment for leukemia or not. in april, july was far + hot + blurry. now it’s practically tomorrow. it’s kind of like realizing how close the spring semester is once you reach the other side of new years, except not entirely because these tests predict + affect our lives in a way that dwarfs sociology 101. overall i’m hopeful + optimistic. strangely, or maybe miraculously, enough i’ve managed to put the reality of cancer in a box and put the box in a locked drawer for the last month, in a denial-free, functioning sort of way.  that could change soon though. and it’s a little scary.

:: history. i’ve always been an english + history > math + science type girl, the emphasis being on english, obviously. recently, however, i’ve really started to fall in love with history. the language arts have been an integral part of my life for so long, it’s exciting to be excited by another branch of education, another world of courses, another potential career path. it makes me a bit sad for people who can’t figure out one thing they want to do, and very grateful that i have trouble settling on just one. and also very grateful that i have the opportunity to take the classes i do on this beautiful + addicting subject.

:: these forgotten moments…

what were your last four weeks like, my dears?

xo Alison

p.s. have you bought the new jack johnson yet? it’s kind of amazing. ❤

into the shadows of dogwood trees

it’s the beginning of may and here’s what’s been on my mind

{at the start of each month i stop & take a moment to recount & remember the last four weeks}

:: smells. the moroccan bazarr febreeze in the bathroom that’s supposed to smell like a market in casablanca + fresh ground ginger, the final dregs of my coco mademoiselle {anyone willing to donate a new bottle? :)}, carmex before bed, the dark, pungent mulch on campus, warm biscuits, and dove shampoo

:: poetry. how much of an anchor it is in my life. how it is truly one of my most vital passions. how much i cherish it. how much mary oliver, galway kinnell, sylvia plath, and ernest hemingway are blowing my mind right now

:: the college of arts and sciences. that is, the physical building itself. how it’s my favorite place on campus, how much it inspires me, encourages me, and makes me feel like i’m at my other home. how much i’m going to miss it when i move on from the university of akron. here’s why ::

:: music. how much fun it’s been to discover peasant, the farewell circuit, mesita, annuals, and mimicking birds. how exciting it’s been to hear new music from old loves like hanson, jack johnson, vampire weekend, and josh ritter. how much i love putting together a warm.weather super playlist featuring the format + fun. + alexi murdoch + joe purdy + harlem shakes + jason mraz. how much music influences and touches my daily life

:: cardinal thomas wolsey. his character and reputation. his skills and shortcomings. his vilification, both fair and unjustified. how amazing it would be to go back to whitehall in 1525 and meet him. how corrupt and brilliant and conniving he was.  how much i’ve enjoyed researching his life and career for my final paper in tudor + stuart britain. how much i’m looking forward to meeting him again during my other history class this fall

:: playoffs.playoffs.playoffs. here are some highlights

:: acceptance. that i will

not being seeing john mayer or jack johnson on tour this summer

still be at UofA this fall, and not at pitt studying creative writing

always be powerless over carbohydrates + good cheese

always have feet that were not made for sexy sandals

be comforting my mom through chemotherapy much sooner than expected

never fully understand physics, parliamentary procedure in 17th century britain, and why people like jay leno

:: my space here. how exciting it is that my blog has gained so many readers in the last few weeks. how semi bizarre it is to think that there are people out there besides my immediate family and super close friends that are interested in my rambles and stories, my photos and quirks, my adventures and misadventures and my favorite wines + supernatural episodes + purses + moleskines + movies + tuesday morning rituals. how warm, safe, content, jubilant, accepted, and creative i feel here. how thankful i am that you are reading this right now

:: nature. how astonishingly beautiful this spring has been. how i’ve spent so much of my time recently leaning into the shadows of dogwood trees and cherry blossoms, taking in their sweet + spicy scent and trying to capture their beauty. how lucky i am to live in a climate that explodes in so many petals of color every april. how excited i am to explore the nature of autumn with my new camera when october comes around this fall

:: these forgotten photos ::

what are you thinking about on this first of the month?

cheers [darlin']

Alison